Rarity Get Your Sword (Epilogue)
by Eddy13
Summary: A short epilogue to the popular fan-comic.


The white unicorn was unceremoniously shoved into the cell before the door closed behind her. Without a word, the guard walked off, leaving the mare to grapple the bars in front of her.

"You can't leave me in here!" Rarity screeched "I'm a high class mare with a respectable business! This cell is too vulgar for one such as me to stay! And furthermore." she said while looking down at the orange garment she was wearing "your prison uniforms are lacking in style!"

"Ah, don't be too upset about it, Rarity" came a voice that was the source of much aggravation to the fashionista "Personally, I think you got off easy."

Rarity's eyes narrowed as she addressed her 'attorney'. "Pinkie, do you have any idea what your poor attempts at being a lawyer have gotten me into?"

"Sure" Pinkie Pie nodded "Ninety days in the hoosegow. You're lucky I was able to negotiate the sentence down. It could've been a lot worse."

"Because _you_ made it that bad!" Rarity shrieked "I thought you said that your services were 100% guaranteed!"

"And I was right!" Pinkie Pie nodded "A 100% guarantee...that you wouldn't get the death sentence."

Rarity was sent into sputtering "How in the world did you manage to get a law degree?!"

"I got it through a brochure course that came with my box of Frosty Fudge!" Pinkie Pie replied "The font on the box was very convincing."

Rarity facehoofed. "I knew I should've hired Twilight to be my attorney. But no! I went with you because you said you could practically guarantee me a win!"

"Now you know why I used the qualifier 'practically'" Pinkie Pie admitted.

Blood rushing to her head, Rarity felt like like she was going to explode, before slamming her face into the bars.

"Pinkie, do you realize that thanks to you, my shop will go out of business?!"

"Relax, Rarity" Pinkie said dismissively "Your sister said she'd take care of your business until you got released. I'm sure it's in good hooves."

* * *

On the other side of Ponyville, ponies were running through the streets in a panic as an out of control fire spread across the town. The origin of which was a once-proud boutique, its promising future had literally gone up in smoke. A few feet away, covered in smudge and soot but unharmed, were three terrified fillies who were huddled together nervously.

"Alright, then we're in agreement" Apple Bloom frantically said to the other two "We blame it on Diamond Tiara."

* * *

Rarity leered at the pink pony. "That doesn't make me feel better, Pinkie."

"Well, you should be happy to know that the giant crab will be going on a trial of his own next week" Pinkie Pie said.

"Really? On what charges?"

"Something about leading a rampage against evil enchanted flowers" Pinkie Pie answered. "I don't know all the details."

"Now you tell me" Rarity moaned.

"Ah, don't worry, Rarity" Pinkie Pie said encouragingly "The ninety days will just fly on by and you'll be free as a bird in no time. It won't be that bad."

"It _wouldn't_ be that bad" Rarity started "if I didn't have to go through the sentence with you along for the ride!"

Sure enough, Pinkie Pie was inside the cell with Rarity, dressed in a similar orange garb.

"I'm still surprised that Princess Luna actually passed a law that would have lawyers share their clients' sentence" Pinkie Pie said in amazement "What do you suppose drove her to do that?"

"I have a good guess" Rarity mumbled, part of her silently wishing she _had_ gotten the death sentence if she had known Luna would pass that new law.

"Unfortunately, this means I'll have to call and tell Bulk Biceps that I'll have to delay his court hearing" Pinkie Pie said before shouting out "YOU'LL HAVE TO WAIT NINETY DAYS FOR YOUR HEARING, BULK!"

"Take your time!" the muscular pegasus said from a distant cell.

"Aah, a little help in here?" a nervous Thunderlane squeaked from the same cell.

Rarity turned to her cellmate "Pinkie, after this fiasco, anypony who would hire you would have to be completely insane!"

* * *

"Yes, hello?" came a voice from inside a statue in the Canterlot gardens "I'd like to hire the services of Pinkie Pie, 'Attorney At Law' in order to get my sentence as a statue reduced? She won't be available for ninety days? Oh, well, I've waited a few millennia, three more months won't hurt."

* * *

"Oh, that reminds me" Pinkie Pie said "Since I charge 50 bits a day and these ninety days will technically be considered overtime, when we get out, you'll owe me about 4750 bits for my services."

Rarity groaned. "I can't believe that I'm going to be cooped up in here with you for ninety days!"

"It won't be that bad" Pinkie Pie shrugged while pointing to the side "Applejack will be with us the whole time."

"How 'n the heck did Pinkie get me dragged into this?!" the cowpony was screeching as she shook the cell's bars "Ah wasn't even involved in that trial!"

"Want to see if we can confirm everyponies beliefs about you two?" Pinkie Pie asked the unicorn mischievously "It worked for Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy."

Rarity just groaned and laid her face against the bars of the cell again.

"Could you at least take off that ridiculous wig?" she asked the imprisoned party pony without looking "A crew-cut does not suit you."

"What wig?"


End file.
